Saturday, November 1, 2008

These are the days.

Dear readers,

You may have been wondering what has been happening in my life in recent times. (:
 
I am sorry to disappoint because I am still alive and well (FAIRLY well). Yeah. Or maybe you weren't wondering at all. Hmmm...yeah.

In the month of October...

  • I went for the Cambridge interviews.
Fluffed it...I think. I am sure! Well, surprisingly the interview did not cover economic issues but too a more mathematical perspective. Indeed. I ain't going to Cambridge after all. :P

  • I got rejected by UCL.
Unexplained occurrence. I am not sure why, it's just the case and I gotta deal with it, I guess. I suppose I am not good enough for them.  Pfft. Yeah. It just says my application is unsuccessful. Creatively put so as not to hurt my feelings I suppose. Unsuccessful being the euphemism for REJECTED. lolz.

  • I am at odds about my US applications.
Now that I got 640 for Math. Still got an essay to finish for Columbia. 

  •  AS is fast approaching.
Yeah. Self-explanatory.

  • And...*insert drumroll*...I am a new, new person. 
Said before. But events during the month have forced me to reconsider my life. xD So...yeah.

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Rant.

Which is what I am about to do. I know, that among all my shortcomings and weaknesses, one of them lies bare for all the world to see, that is : I am fickle. Fickle in the sense that I can never decide what I ever want or differentiate between what I need and do not need. 

Fickleness is not an addiction, its a malady that can be cured. My drug is you. And I finally realise after all these years, what I want. Because I am intoxicated by your presence, compelled by the similarities that exist between us and so very recklessly in love with you. What can I say?

Nothing much I guess. What can I do? I don't yet know. 

But I am no longer fickle. Because now I have a reason to wait. 

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It is with great pleasure that I can announce that our best friend Datuk Razak Baginda has been acquitted. 

Apparently, the court could not find any evidence of wrongdoing. Well, then, that's the Malaysian judiciary for you. Brilliant. Well-founded upon the pillars of justice. 

I love this country, don't you? 

It makes my life interesting.

hardyharhar.

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And here we are.

At that time of the year again. Another year has passed. 

I am getting older, and the date when I shall leave to pursue my own life is beckoning. Approaching faster than ever. I can already see that pinprick light at the end of the tunnel. A long way to go, but its been a long way to where I am now. 

These are the resolutions I made at the start of this year.

  • Train for swimming. (failed to achieve)
  • Do some community work. (achieved)
  • Get into LSE, UCL, Cambridge, Columbia or Chicago. (yet to know)
  • Go to SEA Forensics again. (failed to achieve)
  • Get an internship during the summer holidays. (failed to achieve)
  • Work hard for exams. (well...)
  • Improve football. (achieved)
  • Go for THIMUN. (failed to achieve)
  • Make a change. Be SOMEONE.  (well...)
Yeah. The most important things to me...I did not achieve. Well. Yeah.
It is my fault. 
I didn't go to MUN meetings the first two terms because I was at eYES.
Didn't get to go for Forensics because...well...my reputation precedes me. *apparently*
Didn't get an internship because I didn't try enough.
Didn't get into UCL.
So...it can be safely concluded. That I did not do a lot of things I set out to do this year.

New resolutions then. For next year. Soon.

Ciao buddy.

2 comments:

fallenangel said...

Hello friend,

I hope you don't feel too down for long. I know that stuff was important and meant something to you, but by no means are you defined by whether you got accepted into a particular uni (if they don't take you, then it's their mistake) or whether you managed to get a summer internship or join the SEA forensics. You say it's your fault you didn't do most of those things, well, everything happens for a reason. There are many things many a person set out to do in his/her life, and most usually fail, but life isn't over and that certainly doesn't make you a failure.

You're so much more than that. =)

fallenangel said...

On an added note about not being accepted to UCL, have you heard of Warren Buffet? He applied for Harvard and didn't get accepted due to his age and because they didn't think he had the aptitude to succeed as an economist. He's now one of the biggest consultants in the field of economics.